“Are You Barely Hanging On?” by Joan Y. Edwards
AreAre you barely hanging on? Is your Velcro grip slipping? I hope you get the peace of mind that you need to hang on. I hope you find the peace for which you search. I can tell you this. It’s going to get better.
What will make it better?
Your attitude and mindset will make it better. Changing your expectations and accepting things as they are now will make it better. If someone has hurt you, you’re not accepting that it was right for them to hurt you. What you are accepting is that you are hurt and you can’t undo the hurt, but you can change the way you think and act in the future. The key to changing emotion is motion. Moving your body will make it better. Taking 10 minutes of positive action will make it better.
Tony Robbins says, “… all emotions serve you…negative emotions are merely calls to action. For example, if you feel frustrated it means that you believe things could be better, and they’re not. This is a call to action telling you there’s something you must do to make this better now.
Here are 7 Suggestions to gain wisdom and calmness to help you through this struggle to survive what happened.
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Take a deep breath.
Say aloud three things for which you are thankful.
Straighten up the clothing in your chest of drawers.
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Take a deep breath.
Say aloud three people you are thankful are your friends.
Walk around the house three times.
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Take a deep breath.
Say aloud. God I need you now.
Lay down and take a short nap.
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Take a deep breath.
Say aloud 3 things you’d like to get done today.
Sing your favorite song. -
Look in the mirror. Take a deep breath.
Say aloud. I am good-looking!
Give yourself a thumbs up sign.
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Look in the mirror. Take a deep breath.
Say aloud. I forgive myself and others. I wipe the slate clean.
God wipes my slates clean.
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Take a deep breath.
Name 3 things that are fun for you.
Do one of them today as soon as you can.
Accept the things you cannot change. The Serenity Prayer may help you. You cannot change someone else. Many times you cannot even change yourself. However, when you accept yourself or situations as they are, you can often see what you can do to make the situation better for you.
Forgive yourself and others. There is a lot going on in your life right now. There are so many things going on that you think you’ve lost control of your life. You hear about other people’s problems, too. That compounds the pressure inside your brain. Many things are going wrong in our world today.
Keep on going. You can do this. Detoxify tense subjects inside your brain, so that the next time you think about this subject, you are calm and peaceful. The Lord’s Prayer is calming for me.
When you resist the pressures put on you by yourself or others. C.G. Jung reminds us that what we resist lives on and on and on. In other words, “What we resist persists.” What we focus on, we are going to get more of. We attract what we think about…what we are worried about. Perhaps say the opposite of what you’ve been saying. Instead of I am a dumb clutz, say, I am graceful and keep my balance.
What problem are you resisting? Brianna Wiest says that what you see as wrong in others may be something wrong in yourself that you’ve overlooked.
Perhaps you’ve been listening to others and no one’s been listening to you. Each time you talk to someone who has terrible stuff going on, you get more depressed. That’s not right. It shouldn’t be happening that way. You are not responsible for other people’s problems, including your parents, your spouse, your brother, or your sister. Each of you is responsible for your own problems.
Kirsten Lind Seal says, “Don’t put all your expectations for socializing, love, and affection into your marriage. Don’t spend 100% of the time with each other. Communication is key. Be kind about it.”
God may not come early, but He won’t be late. Based on 2 Peter 3
Remember that God expects you to trust Him absolutely even in hopeless situations. John 11:40
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Thank you for reading my blog. I hope you’ll share with me and other readers how you calm yourself when you are upset. I hope my suggestions and resources help you. Resources follow my signature.
Never Give Up
Joan Y. Edwards, Author
Flip Flap Floodle
Joan’s Elder Care Guide
Copyright © 2019 Joan Y. Edwards
Resources
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Abigail Brenne. Amanda Linehan. “35 Quick Ways to Find Yourself Again?” https://amandalinehan.com/35-quick-ways-to-find-yourself-again/
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Brianna Wiest. “18 Ways to Detox Your Mind without Having to Go Completely Off the Grid:” https://thoughtcatalog.com/brianna-wiest/2015/07/18-ways-to-detox-your-mind-without-having-to-go-completely-off-the-grid/
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Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend. “Boundaries in Marriage – Not Responsible for Your Mate:” https://www.boundariesbooks.com/boundaries-in-marriage/not-responsible-for-your-mate/
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Jeanette Bridoux. “How To Change Your Mindset for Better Relationships With Others & Yourself:” https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=41&v=EZ958J066iMHN
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Joyce Meyer. “Hang in There. Help is on the Way:” https://joycemeyer.org/everydayanswers/ea-teachings/hang-in-there-help-is-on-the-way
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Kirsten Lind. “How to Manage Marriage after Retirement:” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ago8CUH9a0
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Linda Esposito. “3 Essential Exercises to Calm Anxiety:” https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/anxiety-zen/201701/3-essential-exercises-calm-anxiety
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“Marriage VLog: When Expectations Wreck Your Marriage:” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWF0RIdffGI
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Newlyweds Dish. “How Do You Split Up the Marriage Roles in Your House?” https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=45&v=gow2cQPI86Q
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Noam Shpancer Ph.D. “Action Creates Emotion:” https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/insight-therapy/201010/action-creates-emotion
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Reinhold Niebuhr. “Serenity Prayer:” Serenity Prayer – Wikipedia
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Tanya J. Peterson. “Ways to Cope with Anxiety:” https://www.healthyplace.com/self-help/anxiety/coping-skills-for-anxiety-ways-to-cope-with-anxiety